The Onion has the WORLD EXCLUSIVE first details of Modern Warfare 3, which developer Infinity Ward is apparently putting the "final touches on." There's so much scrumptious information in the Onion report, it's almost like the respected media source made the whole thing up.
Modern Warfare 3 will blow away its predecessor in the realism department, being the most "true to life" installment of the game ever produced. A "majority" of gameplay will have players hauling equipment, cleaning vehicles, experiencing home sickness and "filling out paperwork." Check out the full report after the break. We're so bummed we weren't invited to the reveal junket, which had journalists sleeping in the Pentagon and being briefed in "the war room" (which actually has a sign: "No Fighting Allowed!").